"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose" (Rom 8:28).
Oh spare me!!!
For the moment I'm ok in the current physical state i'm in. The dreaded (by me only ok?) but truly anointed Rev. Benny Hinn is in town. Thanks to my church. (really thanks, not sarcastic one ah.) The much enthusiastic invitationsss (& insistence)to be present at that event is overwhelming!!!! I had notified two weeks in advance to me cellgroup leader and fellow members of my conviction of not going. But like the dutiful and gracious Christians they are...they still try, try and try. (even from outside my cellgroup!) I find no fault in that and applaud their persistence. So i did what i know i must do to avoid saying another no to them. (I became...uncontactable.)
Brothers and sisters, its been 30 years since I'm born a disabled. I may not love this body, i love it enough not to go through another traumatic healing rally. Its tough explaining my faith on this issue but i believe this is between me and God ok? So please respect me.. :) thanks. BTW. a fellow disabled too wrote of his experience and i had email to some. I attach below his article unadulterated. Alternatively you can visit his website at http://web.singnet.com.sg/~tliang/
Unhealed by not unhappy too; :P
Michael G aka WindyG
P.S: Stop the SMSs to ask me to go okie?? Really..please...
Unhealed but not unhappy... by Brother Gilbert Tan
"You have no faith!" The threatening finger of accusation has been pointed at me on countless occasions.
Six years ago, a freak accident left me severely paralyzed from neck downwards. On the fourth of August, my life was rerouted. I was set on a new road as a Christian. Suddenly there were questions that needed to be answered. Can this really be the will of God? Am I being punished? Can there be a miracle? I soon discovered that those who share the same faith can add more hurt and confusion to my predicament.
Perhaps like the Jews who expected their Messiah to come in power and forcibly rid them of their enemies, Christians today make the same mistake of prescribing cures and answers to pain and evil, forgetting that the Lord knows best what must be done. The Word of God helps me reply appropriately to the Eliphazes, Bildads and Zophars of this world.
"You must try to walk," they concurred. "How can you say you have faith if you don't show it with actions?" If faith the deciding factor in healing? Is God's healing power dependent on the measure of our faith?
"Immediately the boy's father exclaimed, 'I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief"; (Mk 9:24).
Jesus healed the son of a man who admitted he had no faith. A misplaced understanding of faith can be comically tragic. During the Reinhard Bonnke rally at the National Stadium, I was surrounded by a group of overzealous counselors and ushers who presupposed that I must be healed. I presumed that should there be a miracle in my life, I would be the first to know. The mob fervently prayed and was not satisfied until they saw a miracle take place.
"You must try to walk," they concurred. "How can you say you have faith if you don't show it with actions?"
I protested that I was heavy, that it would be extremely difficult to carry me. They were not convinced. One guy unbelted my wheelchair, another pulled my legs and a burly-sized man tried to lift me from the front in a bear hug. They did not know how to handle a handicapped person at all. My shoulders hurt. A piercing pain. I screamed in agony. My sandals fell off, my sarong slipped down, my T-shirt rolled up my chest and I was left lying flat on my back on the running track of the stadium. I was humiliatingly naked before all men.
My mother was in tears beside me, feeling helplessly lost. She managed to get hold of a volunteer who was with another disabled person and they both lifted me back to the security of my wheelchair. By then, all of the counsellors and ushers, save two, had disappeared.
Two disabled friends of mine, John and Jane, were going through a similar predicament. I hear Jane pleading, "Don't, don't" in Mandarin. John's hair was ruffled, his long sleeves unrolled and shirt disheveled as two men propped him up in a standing position. A spastic church member was painstakingly led in a staggered walk for almost a hundred meters to and fro.
Episodes like this make me wary of rallies and crusades with "miracle healing" and "prayer for the sick" tags. I asked God that if it be possible, let the healing take place in the comfort and privacy of my home.
My apprehension was further increased by Christian friends who excitedly related the miracles they witnessed at such meetings which, upon my own investigation, were found to be false.
Misunderstanding may arise for the following reasons:
1. Wrong Assumption
Not all people who use wheelchairs are wheel-bound - the need of a wheelchair to move around. Some use it because they find difficulty in walking, be it pain in the legs or hips, or after a surgical operation. Sometimes they prefer the use of wheelchairs to crutches or artificial limbs for their speed and convenience. That means when you witness people rising from their wheelchairs and walking around at crusades and rallies, it does not qualify that a miracle has taken place. But I have seen Christians at one of these occasions hoisting a wheelchair into the air in a rapturous celebration. I shudder to think what misinterpretations those in the stadium gallery would assume when seeing a wheelchair being pranced around in a distance like a pagan ritual. Christians, of all people, must portray the truth; such farce should never be condoned or accepted.
There is also the myth that tragedies and misfortunes do not befall those who have faith. Hebrews lists down not only what great men of faith achieved but also what they went through - jeered, flogged, chained and put in prison; stoned, sawed in two, put to death by the sword; went about in sheepskins and goatskins, destitute, persecuted and mistreated (Heb 11:35-37).
2. Wrong Reasoning
It is not uncommon to hear a line of reasoning that your great grandfather have sinned and you are being punished for it, quoting: "...for I the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation of those who hate Me" (Ex 20:5, Deut 5:9-10). To this, Rev Naomi Dowdy of Trinity Christian Centre retorts, "If my parents and grand parents were not Christians and if they practiced idol worship or even took me to temples when I was young, does that mean I will be punished for their acts? 'Punishing the children for the sin of the father' speaks of the result of sin being felt by descendants. Sin is not only an act, but also an evil influence which, when set in motion, results in consequences which can affect more than just those who commit the sin." (Rev Naomi Dowdy, "What The Scripture Really Says About the Sins of My Forefathers," Communique) Environmental decadence and pollution due to man's carelessness, and the consequence of pre-marital sex on the resultant illegitimate child are just two examples. Ezekiel 18:19, 20 says:
"Yet you ask, 'Why does the son not share the guilt of his father?' Since the son has done what is just and right and has been careful to keep all my decrees, he will surely live. The soul who sins is the one who will die. The son will not share the guilt of the father, nor will the father share the guilt of the son. The righteousness of the righteous man will be credited to him, and the wickedness of the wicked will be charged against him".
3. Wrong Accusation
"You have a secret sin." This is the most unkind comment of all. While I was in the hospital, some Christians who prayed for me were determined to bleed the confession of this so-called secret sin out of me. It was such a distasteful and disgusting experience that really had me crying out to the Lord.
I threw myself at the mercy of God, fully aware that I was a sinner save by grace. Jesus loves me enough to die on the cross for me in spite of who I am and what I have done. How ironical it is for me to be facing this from fellow believers. God forgives (even if men do not!) whenever I come before His throne in repentance. Job's response to his wife's doubts about this integrity was, "You talk like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God and not trouble?" The Scripture says that "in all this, Job did not sin in what he said" (Job 2:10).
It has been the folly of man to try to fathom the infinite mind of God. It is futile for man to reason and theorize in order to rationalize all of life's paradoxes. "The secret things belong to the Lord" (Deut 29:29). "Can you fathom the mysteries of God? Can you probe the limits of the Almighty?" (Job 11:7). "He has made everything beautiful in His time." (Eccles 3:ll).
4. Wrong Usage of Scripture
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose" (Rom 8:28).
We may not have a proper concept of good and evil. Pain which most would consider bad, actually let us know what has gone wrong in the body. For example, tiredness is a body signal that warns, "Hey, it's time to rest" before one gets a nervous breakdown. A father disciplines his child for his good. And although death is the final cheat to many a man, the apostle Paul even advocates that, for the Christian, to die is gain (Phil 1:21). We look upon our Heavenly Father with suspicion during painful chastening but God's ultimate intention is for our won good (Heb 12:11).
Some blessings are intangible and often come disguised. Usually these are the better ones - the building of character as in the fruit of the Holy Spirit, the wisdom that Solomon asked for and Mary choosing "the better thing" over Martha. Good health and prosperity are much desired but it is adversity that produces the most satisfying victories.
Since my accident, I have been able to testify to the little miracles and lessons that cannot be gleaned from Bible schools. God alone will decide whether I will be able to walk again. What matters is His continuing work in my life, the process of moulding me to be more like Jesus. And when He has tried me, I shall "receive the crown of life." That is where the miracle lies.
"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along." You must do the thing you think you cannot do." - Eleanor Roosevelt
